July Not So Hot Questions and Lamely Muggy Answers
Q: If you had to define yourself in reference to a famous movie star who would it be?
A: Ethel Merman gone bad.
Q: Fries or Rings?
A: Dammit. Another religious question — and one that I can’t answer definitively. I mean, fries are wonderful — hot, crisp, and salty. Island fries are my favorite healthy fry and McDonald’s is my favorite unhealthy fry. I eat them until I puke and never grow tired of them. Fries are the only food that I pile the salt on and one of the few foods I get cravings for. On the other hand, onion rings are in a class by themselves even though they are also hot, crisp, and salty. They are way more greasy and heavy and you reach your puke threshold way faster than with fries. But the taste of onion rings done right can’t be beat. And this all brings up another question. Why haven’t other fried vegetables caught on? Why not french-fried carrots or turnip rings? All this talk about french-fried things make me remember one of my tragically unfulfilled wishes — french-fried twinkees! FTW! I think I’ll find the recipe on the Internet and make some this weekend. [Deep-Fried Twinkees]
Q: What’s the biggest secret you’re hanging on to right now?
A: Um… okay. I’m going to type this real slow. If I get ahead of your brain flow, let me know. I’ll can also put it in big crayola font if you need the extra help. A secret, you clueless moron , by it’s definition dictates that you don’t tell people what it is. If you do tell people what it is, then it’s not a secret. If you still don’t get a clue, then let me know and I’ll break out the jumbo multi-colored flash cards.
Q: If you had the power and resources to add a place or structure or service to your city what would it be?
A: Miniature golf. I am not sure how we can even classify ourselves as a first-rate country when there are countless towns across the continent devoid of even the smallest, ramshackle miniature golf course. Global warming and unemployment pale in comparison to this unfathomable omission. Seriously, I would love to see a return to the good old fashion miniature golf course complex with two or three courses, video machine rooms, pool tables, and maybe even a go-cart complex. I know we have one in Puente Hills (I think) and Anaheim Hills (or there abouts), and I vaguely remember one out towards Norco. But those are way too far away and not convenient. I think one in Brea would be a perfect addition to Brea. And let’s put an A&W Drive-thru and Car-Hop right smack next to it!
Q: If you were a breakfast cereal, what would you be?
A: Breakfast cereal… that’s so limiting. I want to be something that gets people to tipping me over and getting in my box hour after hour. Granola with Raisins, Dates, and Pecans — because I’m a robust, heavy, and natural kind of guy. Eat me. Right out of the box. Because people dipping their hands into my box throughout the day makes my granola clusters all moist and gooey!
July 1, 2010
Tags: About Me Posted in: Potpourri for $400
One Response
Yeah! An A&W restaurant!! Whoo hoo!
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